We're pretty bad about getting them to clear their plates. I do think that having several tasks that they're expected to do is a good idea, though it means that we'll have to stretch to build all the supports to make sure it happens.
In the instance of clearing plates, those supports might be a) message that "the table needs to be clear a…
We're pretty bad about getting them to clear their plates. I do think that having several tasks that they're expected to do is a good idea, though it means that we'll have to stretch to build all the supports to make sure it happens.
In the instance of clearing plates, those supports might be a) message that "the table needs to be clear and clean so we can use it for activities," and b) we all need to help cleaning the table, and c) how can you be a helper with the table? and d) don't let the children leave the table until their part is done, if all messaging and reminding fails. Call this "soft power," the iron hand in the velvet glove. It's important that parents enforce their expectations consistently.
We are very inconsistent. Often (usually) we forget to ask, which means they certainly don’t do it unprompted. Then there’s putting away toys when it’s bedtime, and I don’t want to take several extra minutes to help them put away the MagnaTiles, let alone have them do it all themselves, which would take more time and require us to give notes like “You missed some over there” seven times. But that’s up to us to take the extra time or stop play sooner.
First, MagnaTiles are awesome. Secondly, it's true, getting the kids to pitch in just doesn't come naturally to us anymore. It takes a stretch, and some goal-setting and planning. But I think it's worth it. Let us know if you have any practices that are working for you.
PS. I'm submitting a book for publication in a couple weeks, in which I take a deep dive into all of this. So stay tuned!
Julian, sorry I missed this question a couple weeks ago. We've narrowed the book title down to three possibilities, and we're running them past publishers. We'll see what comes out the other end...
We're pretty bad about getting them to clear their plates. I do think that having several tasks that they're expected to do is a good idea, though it means that we'll have to stretch to build all the supports to make sure it happens.
In the instance of clearing plates, those supports might be a) message that "the table needs to be clear and clean so we can use it for activities," and b) we all need to help cleaning the table, and c) how can you be a helper with the table? and d) don't let the children leave the table until their part is done, if all messaging and reminding fails. Call this "soft power," the iron hand in the velvet glove. It's important that parents enforce their expectations consistently.
We are very inconsistent. Often (usually) we forget to ask, which means they certainly don’t do it unprompted. Then there’s putting away toys when it’s bedtime, and I don’t want to take several extra minutes to help them put away the MagnaTiles, let alone have them do it all themselves, which would take more time and require us to give notes like “You missed some over there” seven times. But that’s up to us to take the extra time or stop play sooner.
First, MagnaTiles are awesome. Secondly, it's true, getting the kids to pitch in just doesn't come naturally to us anymore. It takes a stretch, and some goal-setting and planning. But I think it's worth it. Let us know if you have any practices that are working for you.
PS. I'm submitting a book for publication in a couple weeks, in which I take a deep dive into all of this. So stay tuned!
“Let us know if you have any practices that are working for you.” Lol. Or IJBOL, as the kids say.
Did you end up picking a book title?
Julian, sorry I missed this question a couple weeks ago. We've narrowed the book title down to three possibilities, and we're running them past publishers. We'll see what comes out the other end...